I am on a Lonely Road and I am Traveling Traveling Traveling Traveling

...looking for something. What could it be?" To finish Joni's thought.

For a few years, the bulk of my dreams have a couple of common threads. And that has intensified over the past few months. 1) I am always in some kind of building of gigantic proportions. Usually has a very gothic and overwhelming feel. Or, it can be some kind of large, old farmhouse or outbuildings. If it's the farm thing, it's usually my grandparents' house. 2) The other common thread is that I'm searching for something. Sometimes, it's something physical, like set of sheets for a bed. Or, I'm searching for a certain room that I cannot find. Other times, I'm searching for a person. But I"m always just going from room to room to room. Looking, looking, looking. Sometimes I have my husband or good friends or my parents along with me. Other times I am simply alone.

Another variation on those dreams is that I'm in a huge swimming pool, filled with people, and I'm trying to get through. Sometimes the floor in a large room will fall away and we're all suddenly dropped into a swimming pool. Interesting, in that I used to be very afraid of swimming. I'm less so these days.

Hum. So you don't have to be Sigmund Freud to see that I'm looking for something. In many ways, I think I'm searching for my identity. I'm smack in the middle of my 30's now. (I'll be 35 in a few short months.) Who am I? Mom? Wife? Business woman? Certain doors have closed, as they have for all of us in our 30s. I have a hard time with that one. I wanted to be the whiz kid with the whole world open in front of me forever.

On that note, I have to run.

Comments

[Jackie]

Hey, what doors closed, other than I can't stay up much past 12 anymore, (Maybe I mean 10) now you got me scared, and I'm in my 40's?

[Margarita Mama]

I have a recurring "giant building" dream as well. But I'm always back at my high school, except it's really large and overwhelming, I can't find anything and I can't remember my locker combination. It's always dark outside, and I'm always rushing and late. And I thought high school was fun and not intimidating, so I'm not reliving an awful memory or something.

Swimming pool one is interesting. Couldn't analyze it if I tried, because public swimming kind of grosses me out, so I'd have a different take on a pool packed with people. Ew. What else does a swimming pool represent to you?